Counselling -

One of the Best Things Women Can Do For Their Marriage

A woman needs many different things to go right for her if she’s going to have a harmonious marriage. It helps to have healthy children that are also well behaved. The lines of communication between her and her husband need to be clear. Finances are also important, yet there is one thing that needs to be higher up the priority list than it probably is: the health of her female friendships. For many women this seems obvious but it keeps falling lower down on their “to do” list. Our world has changed to such a degree over the last 40 years that women have less time to meet with their female friends.

Husbands can only do so much. The decrease in time spent with female friends has hurt women and their marriage relationships. Many women are unaware of how this in impacting them. Some think men should fill the gap. This sounds nice in theory. The reality of the situation is quite different though.

Men can certainly fill some of the emotional needs a woman has. A husband can provide a listening ear and kind word. The primary role of men is still to provide and protect. Most men don’t have the capacity to help support their wife in the manner a close female friend would. They also have a tendency to interpret their wife’s expressions of frustration as a personal attack.

Women need time to process through their thoughts and feelings. Men generally find this odd. The male model of figuring things out is a more solitary process. Close female friends are able to provide clarity to one and other through the process of sharing. Sharing creates closeness and alleviates the fear of being alone. Women who don’t feel alone are more capable spouses and mothers.

Setting aside more time to build relationships with female friends is vital for women who want a healthy marriage. Expecting your husband to fill this role is counter productive. Men don’t have the same need to talk as you have. Men need more physical activities in order to reduce less stress.

Healthy spouses respect the gender differences of their mate. If you’ve allowed your female friendships to lapse, make some changes. The well being of your marriage is at stake. Change some of your priorities. Maybe the house doesn’t get cleaned as much? Some activities might need to be dropped.

Don’t wait for your girlfriends to call you. Most women have too much on their plates already. They’ll be happy you called. Most women are in serious need of more connecting time. Married women with kids are being pulled in all directions at once.

It needn’t be something elaborate. It doesn’t have to take a lot of time. The key is to be consistent. The best thing is to have regular times to meet up and share. Avoid long periods without connecting with a trusted friend. You will feel better and your marriage will run smoother.